Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Steady State

Steady state, that's what we're in now. We've got our Skip's-wound-is-small-and-healing-slowly routine settled in. It's a bit like being in limbo. The wound isn't all consuming, but it still shapes a lot of our daily lives.

We have our morning routines and our bedtime routines. We know when the nurses and the aids are coming. Every day, I keep Skip up to date about meetings and other work obligations so she knows my schedule. I know where she'll be.

This isn't our ideal. Skip wants to be up more, she wants to get out more, she wants the pain to go away. She's restless and doesn't feel quite human while spending so much time in bed. We both want to get rid of the hospital bed and buy a new bed that we sleep in together. I'd like to get out more and be a bit more engaged with the outside world. I feel lonely and isolated.

We both know this steady state isn't forever. It's working for now while we get the wound healed. We're counting on this state lasting for months, but not years. We'd both hate for this to be our forever state.


Lisa Emrich said...

Hi Cranky,

You and Skip have been dealing with this wound for quite some time now. It's good news to hear that it is finally healing, albeit slowly.

It really must be lonely not being able to engage more at home and outside of the home because of the steady routines.

I don't have any suggestions, but hope that you are able to connect with people even just a little.

I'd love to read someday that the wound is thoroughly healed, you guys are back to normal, and you've replaced the hospital bed. Sounds nice indeed.

Hang in there!

Cranky said...

Lisa - thanks for the note. I look forward to all those things too. And, one other thing, the ability to travel. We can't go anywhere until that wound goes first!

Diane J Standiford said...

We have often felt that forever state and it some ways for decades it has become our life, but one thing I learned was that forever states of health and well being are rearely forever states. It just feels like it could be, but I don't see that happening with you two. Look how far you have come!

Herrad said...

Hi Cranky,
Hope you boh get what cyou both want soon.
It has been awhile since I visited many blogs.
Decided to do a quick visit to say hello to as many blogs as possible tonight..
Nice to visit your blog its been ages, I am sure it will not be so long again especially now my life is getting better.
I went out this afternoon for the first time since 19 August 2009 and it was brilliant.
Lovely to feel my world getting bigger again after all this time in bed.
Have a good evening and a pleasant day tomorrow.
Please visit Steve @ The Wheel Of Fortuna


Important we support him in the first weeks of his bereavement.

Cranky said...

Diane - you're right, these states aren't forever states. Unfortunately, with SPMS, the next state is usually worse! In this case, though, as we emerge from the wound management state, I'm looking forward to a future phase that's definitely better.

Herrad - thanks for stopping by. It's so exciting that you got out! I saw your note that you'd be going out so I'll have to check out your posting whereyou cover it. Hope Richie took pics!

awb said...

Here's to hoping the wound heals quickly and life can return to normal. You both are in my thoughts.