Monday, April 20, 2009

Cranky Reason #9: This Freakin' Disease!

Cranky Reason #9: MS! So how did I miss this one, plain as the nose on my face? I'd guess I didn't think of it before because MS isn't the thing that triggers crankiness, but instead makes my reactions to other events turn to crankiness more easily.
It takes a while for crankiness to build enough for me to verbalize it. In my mind, when I think of the impact that MS has on my mood, my anger/resentment/
bitterness about MS has already got the crank reservoir half-full. So, I get cranky more quickly than I did pre-MS (back in the dawn of time). The image here is intended to depict my view of this ... the crank reservoir that would be empty without MS is already halfway to cranky without any of the Cranky Reasons I've already discussed coming into play. This means I'm faster to anger. My cranky reaction is also more exaggerated than in the past ... though I can't think of an analogy to help explain that.
De-Crank Strategy: If I can remember it's the #&*%$ disease that's the problem here, that might slow down the crankiness. Hard to get cranky with Skip if we're in this situation because of MS. It may help from time to time to acknowledge how terrible the impact of this disease has been on our lives. I think it's just horrific that this disease has robbed so much from us and is also able to help drive a wedge between us due to its emotional effects on me (and Skip, too). Damned disease!


Herrad said...

Hi Cranky,

MS is a really shitty disease which has totally devasted our lives.

It is horrific the impact it has had and still will have.

Horrible that so much good has been taken from our lives.

Good that love remains.

Take care of each other.

Have a good day, hope you also have good weather as we do.



Cranky said...

Herrad - I think your comment says it all.

On the weather front, though, it's a bit cold and overcast here. The Boston Marathon is run today, and I think the runners like it cool. I, however, am completely and utterly done with the cold weather!